Last time, I sat down with Shui-yin Sharon Yam to talk about ambiguous loss, diasporic parenting and grieving the what-ifs. Thank you to those who sent me nice feedback about that one. As you might imagine, it wasn’t an easy one to record, but it felt necessary after I realised that we all experience ambiguous loss in one way or another. Today I’m talking to Heba Gowayed. She is a writer and associate professor of sociology at CUNY Hunter College and Graduate Center. Her research and writing centers the lives of people who migrate across borders and the unequal and often violent institutions they face. I wanted to have Heba on to talk about a piece she had written for In These Times called “On Parenthood and Genocide,” which was republished in the book “We Grow the World Together: Parenting Toward Abolition” edited by Maya Schenwar and Kim Wilson. Heba, like me, has a kid who is roughly the same age as mine. We’re both raising them in mixed Arab/non-Arab families in the diaspora in the West, and we have both been deeply impacted by what it all means in the context of a genocide against our people, especially as both of our kids were born end of 2023. In fact, this episode will be out not long before the third anniversary of the ongoing Western-backed Israeli genocide against Palestinians, which itself started about a week before my own kid was born. So it’s all been a bit much to be honest with you, but I hope you’ll find something in this episode regardless of whether you’re a parent or not. The monstrosities unleashed by the Israelis have contributed to an acceleration of the decline of whatever is left of international human rights, a decline that authoritarian governments everywhere are enjoying. I believe that part of how we fight back is through understanding what is actually happening, and the stories we talk about here – mine and Heba’s – are only a part of a much wider trend that is affecting millions.Admin: You can still register for my November class, the 5th and last class on modern Lebanese history and politics before I take a long break from it all. If you’ve ever wanted to learn more about Lebanon and why it matters so much to today’s geopolitical nightmare, I think you’ll benefit from taking this class. I have a lot – and I do mean a lot – of episodes that I’m recording in the coming weeks. If you choose to support this podcast on Patreon.com/thefirethesetimes, you’ll get early access to al of them. If you have an iPhone, I recommend subscribing from a browser instead of your phone as it’s less expensive for you to do so because Apple thought it wasn’t screwing over creators enough.. You’ll also get exclusive access to the video episodes, our monthly hangout as well as other perks such as the upcoming Discord channel, discounts on upcoming merch, that sort of thing. I’m also working on two separate mini-series that will be released to Patreon supporters all at once, with the public getting them once a month as of 2027. So if this is something you can afford, please consider giving it a shot with a yearly donation. If it doesn’t work out for you after a year’s time, you can stay on the Patreon for free (just message me then) and not lose access to anything. I only ask for an initial year-long commitment, which is cheaper for you than paying monthly anyway. Masterclass on Modern Lebanon: Registration is now open for November 2026.Newsletter: Subscribe to HauntologiesSocial Media: I'm on Bluesky and Instagram.Contact: To collaborate, reach out on ayoub@thefirethesetimes.com / Signal @ Ayoub.02Credit: Elia Ayoub (host, sound editor, episode design), the rosa artist (TFTT theme design, 2026-), Rap and Revenge⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ (Music), ⁠⁠⁠Wenyi Geng⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ (TFTT theme design),⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Hisham Rifai⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ (FTP theme design),⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Molly Crabapple⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ (FTP team profile pics) and ⁠⁠⁠Antidote Zine⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ (Transcriptions).